Archive for May, 2010

Hey yall!
Just your favorite graduate nurse here. Not quite RN yet, gotta get my license first. Which is why I’m blogging, I’m avoiding studying for the NCLEX. Or taking a break, yeah, it’s more of a break. Well I’ve graduated. Again. It’s still surreal at this point, don’t know when it’ll hit me. Maybe when I can STOP STUDYING.
It’s a little odd to be thinking that I’ll be a typical grown-up within the month. Going to work, making money (PRAISE THE LORD!), catching up with friends when I can, etc. I mean, I’ve never really done the “typical” thing or taken the “typical” road. I mean, even just looking back to my undergrad years. Went to school out of state at a college where I voluntarily signed a covenant that I would not drink or have premarital sex (among other things). Then I upped and moved to DC to live with strangers and help raise their children. Also, got a job at Starbucks to pay for a trip to Australia. Then back home to voluntarily give up my sanity for a year. And now, here I am, on the brink of “typical adult land”. And you know what? I COULD NOT BE MORE EXCITED! I mean, I knew the Lord had good things planned, when does He not? But this past weekend, talking with Cecilia, I just got so excited because there are really so many opportunities. This job and life will give me countless chances to love people, whether during my shifts, or mission trips I can afford to go on now or spoiling my family and friends in a small effort to repay them for what they’ve done for me the past year (and past 26 years).
He is so good!

Thank you Lord for carrying me through this past year. Honestly, I know I couldn’t have done it without the hope I have in You.

Mom and dad, thank you for the financial support, safe place to live, sleep and study, for the endless prayers you prayed over me and, most importantly, the food you fed me. No really, most importantly, thank you for your unconditional love, which I know I tested the limits of this past year. You’ve shown me what it is to be the hands and feet of Christ!

Alex and Kaitlyn, thank you for the stethoscope, countless dinners out and amazing support you offered. I know that I was grumpy and demanding, but you always met that with love! You always seemed to know when and what I needed, whether it be a loving text on a Monday morning or a movie with popcorn, peanut butter m&ms and a Snapple.
I had to put this picture up because it is just so “us”. Alex looks goofy and I look slightly confused, but in a happy way!

Cecilia, I hope I never know what it is like to live without you for a year, but you dealt with this past year swimmingly (YES, swimmingly!). You never complained when I didn’t have time to talk or couldn’t come see you, but instead continually offered support, even when you were going through your own pain. I hope that someday I can show you what a marvelous friend you are.

Kelly, you were an amazing example of Jesus’ love for his people through service. You’ve definitely shown me love through acts of service and I am so very grateful. Again, I’ll never be able to repay you, but I know you wouldn’t want me to anyway. And somehow I don’t have a picture with you We’ll have to reenact the party or the pinning or something!

Julie, you pulled me through this with you! If it wasn’t for your constant encouragement, jokes and musical references, I’d have been A LOT more inclined to quit throughout the program. I saw sooo many instances where God used you because you were willing to be a vessel for Him. Thank you for your love for Him and for me. And don’t you dare think you are rid of me now! And I need a picture of you and me too!
I love you all!

LOVE!

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I know I’ve talked about this before, but, dudes, TIME IS WEIRD! I stand by the claim that time gets weirder the older you become. One thing I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to do is go through my old journals. I’ve been steadily journaling since probably freshman year of high school. In the moment, I use it as an outlet, but in the back of my head, I know that it’s really for future-me to come back to. Sometimes I cringe at what I seemed like and acted like and sometimes I’m blown away by revelations I had and wrote about. But it’s really nice to have something tangible that I can visit over and over again and say, “this is me, this is how I became who I am right now.” One thing that really strikes me when I delve into these journals is my evolving idea of romantic love. As a senior in high school, I clearly thought love was like what I saw in movies. I talked a lot about a guy putting his arm around me at a football game or how I was FEELING or how a certain song would always remind me of a certain crush or how I was ABSOLUTELY SURE I WOULD MARRY PRINCE WILLIAM. Okay so that last one was from the journal entry I wrote yesterday. Now, when I think about romantic love, I long for companionship, to discuss life’s complex issues, most of all, I long to laugh until I can’t breathe and my sides hurt and tears are streaming down my face. Maybe, in ten years, I’ll see romantic love as my husband putting the kids to bed and rubbing my feet, who knows!
I recently read Leslie Ludy’s book, “Sacred Singleness” (yes, I’m the girl who reads books on singleness, but judge ye not because YOU ARE READING MY BLOG AND YOU LIKE IT! Feel free to call me Bridget Jones) and I really loved a conversation she describes her single sister-in-law having. Someone asked the SIL if she felt she was called to be single, and her answer was “today I am.” That phrase has been echoing in my head since I read it. For some reason, the place that I’m most ashamed of being single is in my church. I feel like getting married gives you something to show for your life, like a sort of badge of worthiness, especially in a church where marriage has always been emphasized by my peers. But no more! The logical me knows I have plenty to show for my life, and knows that the only One who really matters cares only that what I have to show is love. He is calling me to love, everyone and everything. Because honestly? If I don’t love, who cares if I’m married or not? But let me tell you, I’m sooo excited that I’m called to LOVE and serve Him as a single! So yes, TODAY I am called to be single, and I will do my best to do it justice, be focused on the cares of the Lord and LOVE others.
Yes, I still dream of getting married and He knows that. I do my best to sacrifice my dreams to Him, because if He doesn’t have a hold of them, then I want nothing to do with them. I love this quote from Oswald Chambers and I feel like it was written for me:
“If our hopes seem to be experiencing disappointment right now, it simply means that they are being purified. Every hope or dream of the human mind will be fulfilled if it is noble and of God.”

Anyhoo, what I meant for this post to be about was that time again has tricked my mind as it’s been almost a year since I started my nursing program! My hope of being a nurse is being realized for the Lord is good, and He has carried me through!

LOVE!

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